I was born and raised a fundy in middle America. I was always active in church my whole christian life, including working on the Junior High staff and with Youth for Christ. I was always the 'model' christian; always praying, going to bible studies, reading 'the word of god', and out there saving souls from eternal fire. I fit the ideal christian to a tee, I was truely ready to die for Jesus.

Throughout my years as a christian I studied escatology, creation science, and anything that even hinted that it contained any evidence that might strengthen my belief in Jesus and the bible. It is because of all this one sided knowledge that I came to see what darkness I was truely in. The stage had been set for my demise as a christian because there was not a book in a christian bookstore concerning the evidence of the christian faith that I hadn't studied. Of course my goal in studying was not because I had any nagging doubts, but because I wanted to be able to tear down any argument thrown at me in defense of my faith when trying to save all those lost souls. Looking back I find it disheartening how many weak minded people I 'led to the lord.'

So how did all that junk in my head come to truely save me? Well it was on a night in summer of '95 that I was working for my father-in-law spraying orange trees. I was listening to the radio and flipping through channels looking for a good song when a talkshow caught my ear. I cannot recall anything specifically about what I heard for the remaining five minutes of that show, but I know that the two people talking were saying things about christianity that I had never heard or read before. To say the least, what was said cut right thru me and force me to ask questions for which I had to find the answer. The funniest thing was that I made a decision after struggeling for some time to give myself permission and risk eternal damnation and entertain 'unholy thoughts' for just a couple days and then snap back into my christian mind and thoroughly repent of my ungodly decision to 'listen to the devil'. As you can see I never snapped back. After studing all the opposing information that completely dismanteled christianity, it was not until I finally went back to the books I had studied in support of my christian faith that the nail was put into the coffin of my belief of christianity. If was as if I was reading the works of a first grader. Nothing contained in them was a defense at all!

So now I am free, but I live a life surrounded by christians. All of my family and most of my friends and co-workers are christians. The tide is turning though, because I am picking them off when opportunity arises and freeing them too. Someday soon I will have an army of unbelievers who will be fighting untruth.

Unlike alot of letters I've read about those who have done away with christianity, I do not see that everything that I believed while I was a christian as wrong. Just because I now believe christianity is wrong does not mean that I must think and do the opposite of everything I once was to now be right. Most of the letters I read I find that most have gone from one untruth to the next. For example just because I believed in a god while I was a christian I must now believe in no god, because I was pro-life I must now be pro-abortion, because I was conservative I must now be liberal. It is just suprising how someone who finds the truth about christianity could fall into such mammoth untruths as now believeing in evolution or following the Muslim religion. Take this simple challange and my point will be proved - spend just a little time researching the undisputed facts of evolution and you will thank me for the second biggest enlightenment you will experience in your life. You must alwa

Good luck in your journey.

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