My father was raised Baptist, a special brand called "Free-Will Babtist" which says you're not once-saved-always-saved... I swear his side of the family started the whole damn denomination. My mom I guess was raised Nazarene. They both went to a Nazarene college, met and married - my father switched to her church.

I must say, they really are a convincing duo. They are the most kind and loving and understanding folks ever. They aren't OVERLY-religious, or fanatical. They're just layed back with a peace about them, letting God do whatever they feel he's doin in their lives. They do some outreach, and witness on a subtle level, unobtrusive action-oriented way. Christianity really works for them. Fine by me. They also know that I'm pretty much a nonbeliever at this point, and the whole family prays for me constantly. Whatever...

I was way into church growing up because our family was involved with it. Sporting events, retreats, youth-group, and Bible quizzing - omg this stuff is crazy - intense Bible study on a specific chapter then you go to "meets" and compete for trivia. I made it to the national level one year, but it was in Albuquerque and we weren't THAT into it.

I fell on some tough social times so I hung out at the church, which was right up the street. It's great fellowship and congregation and support.

I got baptized at 9 or 12, I forget.

I've always been an intelligent and "bright" kid, and as that attitude and academic-aspiration manifested in my later years... I basically just don't believe any of it any more.

I feel that Christianity is a great thing for those who need it. I just can't get into something that I know was invented for people who can't seem to handle the idea of going through life without some larger force to call on or blame things on. Nor the idea of the lack of justice in the world. Life isn't fair and not everyone does get punished for "bad" things. That's just the way it is, sorry.

Also, heaven and hell are ridiculous ideas.

When you punish someone on earth, it's so that they will learn from it and not ever do that thing again... so where is the point of an eternal punishment?? there isn't, that's so dumb!

Also, there's no way God is a loving entity and lets half of humanity go to hell because they aren't believers in Jesus. That's absurd.

Also, everyone lives their own reality and everyone's idea of religion and rules and morals are relative, if even they verbally agree on them.

Also, I struggle with homosexuality. However, this isn't really a religious issue. I know now that God isn't going to come down and wipe away my homosexual attractions - regardless of where they came from or why. The matter is more of a personal one - I don't personally feel that homosexuality is correct - even on a scientific or evolved level... it doesn't make since and it's obviously an abheration that I frankly can't grasp.

Which brought me to the idea that God sucks if he would create ppl that inherently loathe aspects of themselves.

I ended up at the same college my parents went to. While I was there, I took the required Intro-to-Bible course. Which I must say obliterated my belief in the valididty of the notion that the Bible is directly God-inspired. The origins are fuzzy and hodge-podge, there are tons of mixed messages. God does almost a total 180 in the new testament. UGH!

Also, at this school I got kicked out. For marijuana, and I'm not even a pot head.

This kinda reinforced to me the fact that my ethics are completely relative.

I think I'm a nice guy, with lots of potential, and I'm not gonna tear myself up about things that are only bad because of social stigma... which just goes back to the idea that religion is only here to make society a strictly-cohesive unit.

Oh jesus god, it just goes on and on

and that's how it all ended... is ending... continues to end i dunno

there was no definate leaving point, just a sort of fade away but finding this site really helped me know that i'm not alone thnx, later!

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