Simple, I started realizing that these stories in the Bible were no different from other myths. I didn't have to rid myself of meaning in life when I ditched Xinanity.

I remember the fear I had when I first picked up an athiest book. I was curious about atheism, but I think I was picking up the book in a scoffing sort of way. Then I read a little. (A book by Madeleine Murray O'Hare I think) and the first thing that struck me was that it was sensible. E.g., shouldn't churches pay taxes?

Also, truth be told, I found the soft, "lovey-dovey", attitude of Xian's very annoying in the Church camp. There was something very cultish about it and all the "Praise Jesus" for the littlest thing was strange.

I also noticed that people were really just trying to express their emotion in Xian terminolgy but that there was no truth behind it. My girlfriend at the time gave me "More Than a Carpenter" and while it was persuasive, I couldn't help but think something was wrong. It would be years before I understood logic and Josh McDowell's lack of it. Plus, I also knew that I was making argument based on flawed logic but thought that it was more important to convince people rather then seek the truth. After all, everyone else was doing it.

Now, I just find people of Faith pathetic, although, I am enjoying learning about logic and, surprise!, the Bible. I've been reading the apocryphal texts and Gnostic Gospels and am interested in the history and formation of myth.

I am a poor man's Bob Price (atheist but enjoy the history of the Bible). I can't let believers ruin history with their poor logic and Faith.

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