I was born and raised as a Roman Catholic in a very religious family. My extended family is both religiouly and politically very conservative.

From a young age I always had doubts about my religion, like why should I belive the bible was real, why should I believe that jesus was god, etc. My family and the catholic church saw my doubts as a "crisis of faith" or some sort of personal flaw. As I began to think about it, I realized that what they meant by faith was believing in things that do not make sense based on our own senses of logic and reason.

I eventually came to the conclusion that what they considered faith, the belief in things that do not make sense regardless of any doubts you might have, was antithetical to true personal and spiritual growth. I came to the conclusion that no god would give me reason and require of me that I not use it only to believe in his church, be saved and go to heaven.

I don't know when I really left the church. I stopped going at age 29, but I had been going without believing for may years beforehand. I could best be descibed as a deist.

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