Why I Joined

Was a victim of sexual abuse and rape, came from an alcoholic/dysfunctional home, searching for meaning in life and purpose, seeking 'family', desperately needed to be loved and accepted. I was saved through my boyfriend whom I later married and am now divorced from.

Why I Left

A process of a few years and heavy involvement in the ministry made me see the very ugly and 'sinful' side of chrisitianity- of course everyting is 'condoned' if it is for the 'Lord' - break whatever rules you want for Him - but everyone else is a 'sinner'. Also was being abused mentaly by my "Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde" husband and the severe hypocrisy and contradictions he displayed in his life (he was born and raised Pentecostal) caused me to question my faith. There is much more involved to the story, but lets just say that I kept getting asked to "forgive" my husband for his infidelities and that perhaps it was "ME" who was causing the marriage problems because I could not trust or forgive him (DUH- after 15 times what the hell would you do?). After more marriage counsellors than I can count I said "fuck this", went into therapy on my own and got a grip on life. I have much less self hatred and am far less self abusive (I was bulemic and a self-laoather for years) since I left the church and my husband. My favorite part of the story is how when I first got saved my "family of god" said they'd ALWAYS be there for me- you know UNCONDITIONAL LOVE LIKE JESUS SHOWED - and how quickly they deserted me when became open about the terrible problems in my marriage and separated from my husband **POOF** - where did they go? LOL Wow - most Xtians are hypocrites - not all of them tho - there are a few good people and I can't blame them for being brainwashed. :(

Details