Astro Lesson
#18 :the.emailman.cometh
Today, let us put our feet up, take a little rest from all that heavy duty
html and have a little chat about email.
We're all aware of the wonders of this 'new' communication tool - how easy it is to
contact and reply to pardners. It's especially neat when dealing with
people over the sea - no more trying to figure out those gosh-darned
international time zones, waiting up til 3am to speak to Granma Gertie back in the old
country. Email's the thing!
However, email, if not used wisely, can cause a few problems, seemingly
lacking the respect of the printed word -
faster.than.a.speeding.bullet ....
Yes. email is fast, but it can also be dangerous. Incidents of 'Road
Rage' have hit the headlines in recent years, and now we hear of
'Flaming' - the act of defaming companies or individuals by email
or chat rooms etc. Retrogrrl thinks there is also a more insidious
form of unleashed grownup temper tantrums, in the guise of 'email
outrage'.
It's like this. In the olden days we sat by the letterbox waiting
for Mr Postie to toddle along on his bicycle, the correspondence
of the world in his hot little satchel. 'Oh goody', we cry, as he
hands us a parcel from the mail order company (wrapped in brown
paper, hmmm?)
Inside we rush, ripping open the package only to discover that rather
than a copy of the latest Internet Digest, we have been sent an
installment of 'Trainspotters Monthly'. Infuriated by the inefficiencies
of the mail order mob, we set pen to paper and scribble an angry
missive re: the company's mistake, and how we were looking forward
to reading the article entitled 'Bill Gates - Man or Myth', but
instead have been forced to peruse 'Know your BX751 Diesel Engine
by Sight and Impress Friends'.
After a second cup of tea and a cookie, stuffing the letter into
an envelope we trot down to the post office for a stamp (45c! Well,
haven't they gone up!). Finally, reaching towards the gaping mouth
of the letter box, we experience a twinge of regret remembering
the harsh words penned - especially that bit about "bald headed
old coots", and "baboons being more intelligent". "Oh well", we
sigh, maybe they'll get it right next time - I'll just return it
and let them know they might have made a small error of judgement.
Come to think of it, trains can be quite interesting...".
Now, lets look at this scenario with the advent of email. Rushing home from work, we gaily switch on
old mate modem and cheerfully wait for the email to download. "Gasp!", we cry. "Will ya look at that!
This month's electronic issue of Internet Digest has not arrived on time. Boy, are they gonna get it!".
Immediately, fingers flashing at the keyboard a nasty note is hastily typed to the editor, (including mention of "baboons"
and "coots"). Stretching a hand towards the mouse, and without hesitation, the SEND button is clicked faster
than a Possum up a tree.
5 minutes later, the latest issue of Internet Digest sits smugly
beeping in the intray for all to see... But it's too late for Mr
Internet to return the email - it's already gone into the wide wired
yonder.
look.before.you.send
The moral of the tale is that email is more powerful than we give it credit for - it is way too easy to send people
messages, so we need to be extra careful what we send and how we say what we send. Think about it - add up
all the email sent and received by your computer over the last few weeks - more than likely it would total a mountain more
than would ever have passed through a real letterbox! That's communication! That's power!
Power for good or power for evil? That's up to you to decide.
Let's get over the excitement of the medium and learn to once again
take a step back - if you are really angry about some issue, maybe
(if you have good self control!) wait til the morrow before clicking
send - hey, leave it in the out tray overnight - it won't get lonely!
Retrogrrl guarantees there may be a few expletives you might wish
to remove... have that cup of tea, munch that cookie - just take a
deep breath and think about it.
the.medium.is.the.message
A great disadvantage of email as opposed to speaking via phone or face to face, is to do with the fact that it has no
personality - um hm, that's right. It's just words on a screen, with no vocal inflection or posture, or smile or frown
to let the reader know whether you are serious or just kidding.
8-) 8-( 8-) 8-( 8-) 8-( 8-) 8-( 8-) 8-( 8-) 8-( 8-)
That's why these little guys were invented - smileys - to let the person at the other end know that you are really mad
8-( or really just joking around 8-)
Retrogrrl says "Reread email and imagine it being read by someone
with no personality or sense of humour - say, someone like, oh I dunno,
Saddam Hussein. Is he going to misconstrue it (in which case, DUCK!!)
or is it perfectly clear that you really meant he was a big joker
and not a big joke (in which case, breathe easy)?"
la.cyberLaw
Be vewy, vewy carefwul - they are hunting email - haaaa haaaaa haaaaa
haaaaaa. Don't be fooled into thinking that email goes off into cyberspace
with nary a trace once it is read - email can be printed and filed,
it can be stored on disk - it can come back to haunt you in years
to come. Did you know that big company's are hiring net-sleuths who
can dig up email from the depths of hard drives, only to use it as
evidence in court cases? It's true and so Retrogrrl says "Think of
email in legal terms - don't put something in an email that you wouldn't
be prepared to put into a written, legally binding document. Of course,
this doesn't apply to those times when you're just enquiring how much
a copy of "Microsoft - Mayhem amongst the Madness" is at the local
bookstore. That's silly. Don't believe us? Read this article
by a local newspaper
return.to.sender
"Manners, manners!", says Retrogrrl. How many times do you click on
an email link at a favorite website - hoping to contact someone, somewhere,
that can help with a problem... maybe just to say what a nice site
it is... maybe to say there's something not quite right with it...
maybe just to say 'Howdy!'. How many times do you get a reply? Not
many, huh?
We at retrocity believe that if there's gonna be an email link on
a webpage, then it's the duty of the person at the end of the link
to reply - it's only good manners after all. Doesn't have to be a
great long spiel - just an acknowledgement that a voice was heard
in the void.
Try it and see - email retrogrrl NOW!
forward.wagons.ho!
Remember those cute animations that everyone sent around at Christmas
time? Weren't they great? Retrogrrl loved the snowman one - it was
really funny. It can be fun to forward such things onto friends vi
email ...
Lesson= Forward fastidiously and not freely!
Remember how to insert an email link in a web page? No? Well here you go ...
<a href="mailto:retrogrrl@bigpond.com">
Wanna make it go to a few different mail addresses at once? No worries ...
<a href="mailto:retrogrrl@bigpond.com,wendy@somewhere.com.au">
Wanna preset a subject in the mail window? Sure thing ...
<a href="mailto:retrogrrl@bigpond.comt?subject=We
love Retro City">
Ah, so much to learn. So little time
Well, that WAS exciting, wasn't it children? Now run along and dabble with these ditherings. Until
next time when we think of something else to waffle on about.
next.pod
copyright.wendy.phillips.1998-2000
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